Monday, December 31, 2007

Top search 2008



As you are in threshold of 2007, waiting to export your mind, body, soul, arse, eyes, ears and such other such bodily and mindly appurtenances to 2008, you may be highly motivated to find out the top search for 2008. If you are thinking that 2008 has not yet began, and how could DiDo write about 2008's top search ; think again & transport your line of vision half an inch below.

When I assigned a job to google search engine with the keywords "2008 hot", it slothily gave a list of yawn producing, disastrously suicide causing, absolutely bland-as-a-sauceless-spaghetti search answers that failed to instigate any spark in my new-year-awaiting-refreshed-thinkbox..



I seriously think that you must click on the image for a better preview...
But, as a sensitive, highly home-loving, desperately idiosyncracy exhibiting, blogger who doesnot want to disappoint climacteric readers who eagerly await a newyear 'hot' search, I hereby present 2008's most Hottest search .
Specially made for mommas or people who are fathers to children whose momma have a jarring red lipstick
Benefits of the product: 1) can scare away tinytots or even silence thier continuous caterwauling temperaments 2) Is a subject of vanity for the owner to brag about 'Hot 2008' search product under her or his wife's ownership.
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Sunday, December 30, 2007

I fixed it..I fixed the gift of pure parental love

People, I am feeling a father who just saw his son recover from a fatal life threatening accident. Yes! I fixed the christmas present I broke. It was a parental gift, which holds so much water to me, since am away from home..Sobs...!


I would like to recommend this product to you:



(though it costed me 3 euros and 15 cents for just freaking 3 grams....)


But look at what it did...It fixed the sign of parental love ...(I also like always, I ended up spilling the resin in my fingers, and that would not come out even after constant scrubbing....Also it made me impossible to eat my indian food with the way its traditionally eaten...that is using God Given hands..)

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Saturday, December 29, 2007

Clumsy Confessions



The amount of catastrophe I cause around me is just too abnormal. And the past 1 week it has been quite enhanced (holiday special mess). It started like this: I dropped a whole tub of vanilla-caramel icecream, I broke a christmas gift (I felt really sad, but am gonna fix it with superglue- also I am really scared cause I may break it further while fixing), I spilled the wine and got my socks and edge of my pillow stained, I did a host of other similar things, besides my usual routine of spilling food on my dress and knocking a full glass of milk/ice tea while protecting my laptop and my spectacles . But all this kept me busy as I had to clean the mess also.


If you wanna know how it is like to have me around, you can see this movie: 'Good luck chuck', the behaviour of the mammal Jessica Alba.
"The icecream is melting, but it feels nice and gooey.."


-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Mistakes you mustnot commit when trying to lure women..


(series 1)



I know you guys always wanted to know this, so read on and apply it in your life to attract the female gender (or atleast following these may help you from getting repelled by females). Now, STOP biting your nails and read on:
  • stop biting your nails
  • stop scratching your whatever...
  • try to improve ur poetry skills (if you dont even have an iota of them, then you must join a crash course thats teaches you to mug up some initial phrases)
  • never compare your girl to a weed, but you can compare her to a flower..(women seem to hate the poor weeds..)..

But in case u compared her to weeds before reading this tip, dont worry its NEVER TOO LATE:
Oh poor men, men..I need to remove the tip due to some requests..But dont worry , u will find more next time..

Disclaimer: the author writer doesnot know how girls may react to satire, despite the author belonging to the glorified feminine gender
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Thursday, December 27, 2007

Cursing without the "F" word...



Welcome to this series. Fellow earthlings-desperate-to-curse, it is possible to curse without the 'F' word. I realise how the 'F' word had made us so dependent on it, just like we are so dependent on certain things in life like the dearly feeling of iPod stuck to your ears (even if it is out of battery) or a piece of chewing gum that so dearly adheres to the inner mucus layer of your jaw..


Lets show the 'F' word, that we can do without it (What the 'f***'). This series begins with an Australian inclination. (I just saw pictures of kangaroos, koalas and tortoises from my friend who had been to Aus recently..Always when u show me pictures, my brain lights up only if I find any non-human biotic being...hence...)


1. If the victim you want to hurl your curse in form of verbal spillings, has a nice round tummy, you can always get ready and let out this phrase as a blasphemy: 'Hey, you kangaroo-pouched-piece-of-meatbone' or something so outrageously australian.

2. Or you may refer to a tough-bummed piece of crap you always wanted to curse as a one with 'koala like-glue-in-your-arse-making-you-stick-on-the-tree'

I think this helped a little. I am so excited to try it on someone. So, try it. Who knows, it may work. But before you try read the health tip.

Health tip: For curse 1, eat 7 more cornflakes (earlier for each "F" word you used, you had to gobble only 1 cornflake extra than your human-survival serving) For curse 2, eat 12 more cornflakes.

Precaution tip: To avail the maximum benefits, make sure that specimen you are about to curse knows that such exotic fauna exists in australia. It always helps the society if you educate an ignorant. For your convineance, we have provided the picture of koala as a teaching tool.

Disclaimer: To the monsters-jus-waiting-to-curse and just in their adolescence, learning-new-curse-to-flaunt-to-their pals: This is not a prurient/lewd/x-rated site. Sorry to disappoint you.


- DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Wednesday, December 26, 2007

Your author's time for herself


'self-grooming-and-effects'


A shot of self-love practised regularly definitely helps. There are times in one's life, when he/she is left to become a lazy bum ignored by the oh-so-lovely friends and relatives. Mostly after a breakup or when your boyfriend is away to maroon in an island just 2 kms to the north of arctic ocean, where internet lines (if at all they existed) were frozen beneath a large dinosaur size glacier. You cease to be in contact and you start looking into 'your' life. Do you have a pending haircut or a broken nail or a novel awaiting? Start indulging. You are not anymore bound to commitments, you can just live for yourself.


The author DiDo decided to demonstrate this strategy to you. Start by making oh-so-lovely profile pictures of yourself. It always works with a few simple ingredients. (nothing is optional, follow strictly)


Ingredients:

1) a mirror

2) a curse directly visible through reflection on your mirror (psychologically makes females feel good)

3) a 3.5 megapixel mobile camera/ anything that can capture images

4) photo enhancing tool like 'picasa'

What DiDo did? 'I love myself...'

(click on the above image to closely look at the effects of PICASA...)
'How did the duck react to the picture?' (he is still alive..)
Well, go and park yourself infront of the mirror after combing your hair if its too frizzy or you look drunk. Do that thing that your IWDEOTS (I-was-dependent-emotionally-on-this-specimen) hates. Maybe a crazy shade of blush or something like that. Then click a nice foto (with the curse visible). Transfer it to your computer, and edit using picasa. Add that glow, and that warm effect and all that.

LOVE YOURSELF..
Send pictures of your 'self-grooming-and-effects' to your author, so she can post it and make women in such desperate situations feel better. *
PS: you can also post pictures of a dog's emotional stress on seeing your picture
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

'Watch this space intently for upcoming DiDo's Doodad part 2.. '

-the way to dash out for shopping with a (no)sense...
Watch:
" ......................................................................................................................."
--DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

One liners that have one line each above and below them


1) I trust only in female friends...
2) Comeon u sleepy abroad-indians,,,,put ur COLDEST winter-feel pic ever* 
3) Friends and buddies, please be thr when I breakup..
4) I want to date a pilot...thats my lifez ambition 
5) Thy have not to use much brains and they look clean like washed dogs, and they eat outside most days 
6) PIGS-Poor Indian Graduate Student & JEFSIS- 'Just enough for survival' indian students (paypal accepted) 
7) I am not drunk...
*I observe this sleet-snow penonmenon first time now...for more related stories read my blogs below

For more such REAL LIFE humor visit: www.didoabroad.blogspot.com
--DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Sunday, December 23, 2007

Redundant Compulsive picture 1


 


If u are just curious as to what happened to this Indian meal (khichdi), I can just say that its no more existant in a gross form but rather as energy molecules that help me type whatever I am typing now.

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

My frizzy Locks..CONTEST

I have a 24x7 unkept hair. It would simply not stay in its place. Suggest an hairstyle for your wordsmith NOW (I have a thin and wavy black hair with 'henna' natural brown...yes truly exotic but definitely unmanageble) and win an exciting trip to the land of Campanula rapunculus... Well you will be responsible for hair dressing for the princess as well...So act soon before my boyfriend ditches me..

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Saturday, December 22, 2007

Snow and alcohol....


email to my extremely handsome dad: WARNING - email may contain grammatical errors but my father doesnt mind, and u also mustnt mind because u have no etiquette and u r now gonna read somebody else' personal email...hi appu
here are d fotos!
the sleet* started sterday and today its even more! tHEY are predicting good snow this winter!
Also fotos of my grad school party of going to christams market. I had my first ever wine..and felt slighly sloshed...but it was really good coz its caled "gluhwein" and its a warm wine with lotsa spices!
ur drunkard daughter,**
Divya
* I lived all my life in Madras in India where it was jus a lot of HOT and sexy glam-stars to keep the city really at a volcanic temperature (Sun is a Star..i learnt in 7th grade physics), also i have seen water solidifying in freezers of my refridgerator....nonetheless this is a first time i see thru my naked (bespectacled) eyes the snow phenonmenon (rather sleet now) at the place where I work in Deustcheland (It refers to 'Germany' u non-foregin-language-knowers...JUS LIKE ME!!!!!!)

**I was brought up in a abstemious, absolutely unspecifically orthodox, crazyily schizophrenia causing community...hence a female specimen drinking alcohol is considered a voodoo...
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

I suffer from chronic Bipolar disorder..


I suffer from chronic bipolar disorder.
Hear Again:
I suffer from chronic bipolar disorder.
Do u see two poles in the place of one ...? Epecially when U r sloshed...? Congrats, Ur alcohol is working!!!.. but we cant certify it as a case of bipolar disorder...better luck next time...try hard.....
Symptoms: acute tendency to freak out, puking the grub-of-the-day every thursday, feeling to shed around 600ml of crocodile tears on that particular day, psychologically tormenting my poor poor boyfriend
Cure: No permanent cure. Just valium for the head and love for the heart.
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

THE TWO DANGEROUS BUDDIES I HAVE...


Men, women and others: I desperately look forward to spending my holidays with two ravishing, indulgently apocalyptic, acutely portentous friends of mine.


They sit here:


Dont stare directly into their burning-coal-like-eyes. They absolutely detest tyranny and they are really quite a "thing". The one on the left is quite an authentic "ninja"...from Japan...
Look at his eyes-
"The Ninja eyes"- Deeply embedded in the tissue and even more deeply contemplating....
And when he is not killing (or ninja-stuff-doing), he is busy cuddling me...

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Friday, December 21, 2007

The naked string..


When u press the tab to go from your username column your password column like this:



Sometimes the body doesnot spend so much energy on the 'tab' button, hence u end up typing the password in the username coulmn . And when your awake mind perceives it through your eyes...like this:
And....it starts looking so naked...like the password is some hot model exposed for the first time...!*
*Dont try clicking on the bolded phrase, there is no link of any glam star attached...
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Wednesday, December 19, 2007

Copulating thoughts..


Whatever you may seem to notice in a workplace, may be a phenonmenon that coincides with similar stories at such highly similar offices or workzones*

Consider this example: The two big rival companies always release a groundbreaking, eye popping, conk-confounding new flavor of coke at the same time.

It happens almost at the same time; with a rarely noted difference of 43 seconds as reported in the U.S.N (Uneccasary Statistics Newsletter), on the June 23rd 1997, (when reportedly the spokesperson of company A, stammered in front of the TV reporters for a continuous 43 seconds ,at which time his eyeballs popped out to observe a female specimen in an adequately skimpy costume) .


So are the thoughts from these two companies communicating? If so which email service do they use and what sort of mobile connection do they employ? Think hard...Really hard...
The service they use is just a spy in form of a human being.
beware...Spies exist like flu...dormant but efficient....

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

*workzones because, not all work in an office, (atleast i dont, i work in a lab), take the case of people working in backery or restaurant or a shopping mall

Monday, December 17, 2007

A newfound habit - kindness


Its an era of mushrooming globalisation. Ask what pizza is to a non-italian south east asian farmer, he may say atleast that it is a round bread with colorful toppings. Also who doesnot know the fast spreading epidemic of reachable technology. (such as internet or a shaving razor)

Being in a foreign land myself, I know definitely how kindness spelt by way of word, act or deed had helped me overcome culture shock, embarassments of not being accoustomed to a new eating habit or confessing a 1001 times to almost everyone, that I dont really know the language in which they spoke and they must take pains to explain again to me in English.
Every person feels these hurdles like a bad neck sprain that requires a soothing balm or a caring hand..) A quasi-second of a kind action to make a foreigner feel at home...

To all the people who made me look less dumb in a foreign land!

Join together....Think for a second....Spout out a nice word/deed/action...
You may never know who would blog about it!

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Another week of weekdays..


Weekends are something we miss like missing a hot cup of coffee on a lazy day... 
Laziness is itself a bliss, it creeps into the body like a dear old friend and lingers like the same dear friend who just refuses to go away after a booze party..
Hence, weekends=missing coffee=laziness
This relationship deserves a minute or so of your "working " and "awake" brain. (I know its difficult to be in a wakeful state after a weekend)

On the lazy day (s), when the soul so dearly wants a cuppa hot coffee, the muscles in the body just simply fail to move to reach the kitchen table to make one. But the coffee is there.. lurking and inviting...

The weekend is also like that. It stays around the corner, but it is inaccessible for another 5 long days... You just need to push your way through the week to grab it again , jus like u must drag your mass to the kitchen to make a coffee for u...
Lets face it..AGAIN... happy week full of weekdays..

-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Friday, December 14, 2007

DiDo's doodad...part 1


True to my blog's middle name, I have always been eccentric... (my middlename is also 'eccentric')

The list of things I did or I do, always irritates people mostly because I live in a uniquely funny world, that they find hard to accept.

Now declared that I have been this way for more 2 decades from my birth, you have to listen to the gadgets that used for making fashion statements:

MyGadgets for MYSELF have been umpteen...

One fine day, way back in 1999, (umpph...a decade ago..), I realised that I was late to meet my friend..(NOTE: she was a creepy highly emaciated creature who hardly used her senses)..Hence, being pretty late, I desperately required something to match my traditional 'Kurta'*.

You must always recall that genius comes in a squishy mess. My wardrobe was a genius too.

It was fraught with absolutely cranky mix of traditional and western clothes that were living together in symbiosis. In the exact 34 nanoseconds I had in hand before rushing out of the house to my friend's place, I had to choose some pants to match my red kurta. And...all that I could get hold of was a pair of blue jeans. So who cares. I wore this red kurta with a blue classical levi.

And,

I started dashing towards the creepy-buddy's residence...

She almost swooned when she saw my dress and started accusing me of creating such a fashion faux-pas by sporting such a weird cranky look.I didnt realise that I would look so damn misplaced in the society. But all this or the stares from people on the streets on my funny combination wouldnot stop me from making such bold cranky statements.

I continued this style.



I dont recall when, but suddenly in my country there was trend (few years later), when pretty ladies (and ugly ones also) followed the fashion-mantra (whatever the shit it means) and started sporting Indo-western wear. And know what? the same society that so badly accused me of an eccentricly misplaced costume sense, now started wearing similar stuff after reading a fashion article on a magazine that can only be read by members of the BUSSW (Brainless and utterly sissy society for Women).

Also I always used to spruce up a list of unidentified and grossly peculiar, shockingly designed accessories...I had this black color intricate designed tattoo jewellery which my grandmom always desperately wanted to shooooo away thinking that it was a creepy insect thronging at my ankle (it was supposed to be an anklet)

This is just episode 1.


But am sure, that gradually in a few days or few months, as my amnesia unveils, I can educate my dear readers on such ABCD (ABsolutely Cranky Doodads). If u r curious on how it would help u...well all that I can say is FOLLOW THE CULT...
*which is a long Indian dress that needs to be worn with a similar colored or patterned traditional pants
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Thursday, December 13, 2007

What powdered garlic can do early in the morning?



When u sprinkle 0.5g of powdered garlic on ur grub during breakfast:

1. It can make u feel like throwing up the coffee u just had

2. U may actually puke


3. It always brings this reaction, when u want to look ur best (mayb to meet somebody)


4. It can make ur neck sprain feel worser


5. It can make a feeling seem funny


- The feeling I mentioned is the raise in a mixture of gases up your oesophagus, when u guzzle an aerated drink, mostly the coke
-DiDo ('YOUR EXOTIC BROWN AUTHOR')

Dido geezers blog: The adipose oppugnant...

Dido geezers blog: The adipose oppugnant...

Wednesday, December 12, 2007

The adipose oppugnant...

As the holiday season starts at full swing, most of us* are looking forward to hogging some foods certified by the FHA (Food Hogging Authority, Miasmaburg) to promise some highly rampant growth of adipose cells.


Look at this closely
Again..
As u see above, we cannot classify this phenonmenon entirely to holiday seasons. It happens at all possible situations, and at all possible timelines and places.

The 'growth' is expected to occur in individuals worldwide**, and its believed to become a pandemic (with minor exceptions as stated in **).

Basically blame it on the SMCA syndrome (Senseless mushrooming Compusive Advertisement Syndrome), that compells us to buy 10E5 products that are so glossified in hoardings, radios, TVs, papers, milk cartons, internet, emails as side banners and various other entertainment resources (also blogs...) Infact these products provide a soothing effect u even when u suffer from the anguish of not attending a party or not meeting up ur boyfriend or not able to submit ur report on time and in such highly demanding situations..U take a bite u get an ounce of renewed face-the-dearies-of-life energy... (Yes i mean the choclate BARS or high calorie cakes..)

But while hogging is at one hand, also consider the fact that life is about abstinance from whatever things you are supposed to be away from (until u dont get a psychic disorder called 'schizophernia' because u didnot eat french fries for 23 days listening to my advice or worser, u r gonna die of coke-thirst, mind u! "coke-thirst" that cannot be satiated even after drinking gallons of water or tea or anyother liquid entity)


To listen wisely, we sought the view of Dr. Fatmutant De fries. ***

"Ride ur way to a slim-line"
-Dr De Fries 

We hear vibrations inside his reverberant brain as De Fries says, 'its a matter of choice, if u think u must lose ur flabs, u must consider some impractical methods that come free, like jogging, starving and so on , or become more practical , invest some money and visit my clinic.'


Ardent smoke pot 'Anonymous' says: 'its just like cigarrete packs, they come with a warning, similarly foods come with a calorie information'



So, its a world of abstinance and temptations, but look at the poetic consequence of hogging;
if u are in love with a over-weight, slim-challenged girlfriend or boyfriend (or both),
u can write poetry superflous with a range of popular cookie brands...
So go on...Hogging...
(or dont... :P) 

*the word 'us' gladly embraces the slim waistline privledged earthlings...also poeple like myself with few extra pounds..yes... 'few'..! 

**except calorie deprived regions from developing countries (the vaccine of poverty is there in their blood)...Yes! think about them the next time you gonna waste your food...

***He gladly sits at the anti-obese clinic and runs a full time clinic that provides low calorie hot dogs, low fat french fries, Zero carbohydrate hamburger (it weighs 1 gram and is certified to fit into microscopic dimensions), also some life style drugs that when applied to eyes to ur boyfriend, would make him quasi-blind so he wouldnot notice ur extra flabs...Also the clinic has some less expensive equipments to work out, like, a hot red color bicycle and a 60-kg bag of basmati rice that needs to go into Doctor's kitchen at his home (located 12 kms away). (If u like to donate to the work-out equipments, the doctor prefers paypal)

The adipose oppugnant...


As the holiday season starts at full swing, most of us* are looking forward to hogging some foods certified by the FHA (Food Hogging Authority, Miasmaburg) to promise some highly rampant growth of adipose cells.

Look at this closely



Again..


As u see above, we cannot entirely classify this phenonmenon to holiday seasons. It happens at all possible situations, and at all possible timelines and places.

The 'growth' is expected to cover the whole earth**, and its believed to become a pandemic (with minor exceptions as stated in **).

Basically blame it on the SMCA syndrome (Senseless mushrooming Compusive Advertisement Syndrome), that compells us to buy 10E5 products that are so glossified in hoardings, radios, TVs, papers, milk cartons, internet, emails as side banners and various other entertainment resources (also blogs...). Infact dont they soothe u even when u suffer from the anguish of not attending a party or not meeting up ur boyfriend or not able to submit ur report on time and in such highly demanding situations?? (Yes i mean the choclate BARS)

But life is about abstinance from whatever things your are supposed to be away from (until u dont get a psychic disorder called 'schizophernia' because u didnot eat french fries for 23 days listening to my advice or worser, u r gonna die of coke-thirst, mind u! coke-thirst that cannot be satiated even after drinking gallons of water or tea or anyother liquid entity)

To listen wisely, we sought the view of Dr. Fatmutant De fries. ***

We hear vibrations inside his reverberant brain as he says, 'its a matter of choice, if u think u must lose ur flabs, u must consider some impractical methods that come free, like jogging, starving and so on , or become more practical , invest some money and visit my clinic.'


Ardent smoke pot 'Anonymous' says: 'its just like cigarrete packs, they come with a warning, similarly foods come with a calorie information'

So, its a world of abstinance and temptations, but look at the poetic consequence of hogging;
if u are in love with a over-weight, slim-challenged girlfriend or boyfriend (or both),
u can write poetry superflous with a range of popular cookie brands...
So go on...Hogging...
(or dont...)

*the word 'us' gladly embraces the slim waistline privledged earthlings...also poeple like myself with few extra pounds..yes... 'few'..!

**except calorie deprived regions from developing countries (the vaccine of poverty is there in their blood)...Yes! think about them the next time you gonna waste your food...
***He gladly sits at the anti-obese clinic and runs a full time clinic that provides low calorie hot dogs, low fat french fries, Zero carbohydrate hamburger (it weighs 1 gram and is certified to fit into microscopic dimensions), also some life style drugs that when applied to eyes to ur boyfriend, would make him quasi-blind so he wouldnot notice ur extra flabs...Also the clinic has some less expensive equipments to work out, like, a hot red color bicycle and a 60-kg bag of basmati rice that needs to go into Doctor's kitchen at his home (located 12 kms away). (If u like to donate to the work-out equipments, the doctor prefers paypal)

Wednesday, December 5, 2007

Not only me...


I thought i was crazy...

I am crazy infact...



But look at this my childhood friend is ALSO very crazy... I think we grew up in a phenonmenon that fostered in us all these wacky dimensions. What my friend wrote in a post of a internet social network run by Google called orkut:
Hey I am from the janitor of ORKUT, evrybody sorry for the interupption, but before orkut is closing the system down because too many botter are taking up all the names, we only have 57 names left.
NOW TELL ME WHO THE HELL BROKE OUR ORKUT OFFICE BLOCK 29-C's URINAL CLOSET, BEFORE I END UP HACKING YOU TO DEATH..!!! .
IF YOU WOULD LIKE TO END YOUR LIFE IN MY HANDS FOR A URINAL CLOSET, DONT SEND THIS MESSAGE , IF YOU WANT TO LIVE A LITTLE LONGER, THEN SEND THIS MESSAGE TO EVERYONE INSIDE AND OUTSIDE ORKUT, EVEN YOU CAN TAKE A PRINT AND PASTE IT ON UR LOCAL AREA RESIDENTIAL WALLS, YOU WILL BE SORRY IF YOU DONT SEND IT. THANKS DIRECTOR OF ORKUT FOR REDUCING MY SALARY FOR A BROKEN URINAL CLOSET . WHO EVER DOESNT SEND THIS MESSAGE, YOUR LIFE WILL BE IN THE HANDS OF A PSYCHOTIC KILLER IN SEARCH OF A ACCUSED WHO INTENDLY BROKEN THE URINAL CLOSET IN-ORDER SUSPEND ME ..!!


So, this is to inform the public that these sorts of messages are just ANOTHER form of spamming (as told by my boyfriend...). Stop encouraging spams, they come free but they persist like a bad dysentry.

-DiDo

Thursday, November 29, 2007

To the one i belong to:


I have always known u..We were sending quarks of energy to each other from the time we were babies (or from that instant when life touched a mass of cells in our mother's womb)we had secret transfer of thoughts, behaviour, habits and so on....otherwise how can we be so alike sub-consciously?
and when life set us a REAL dimension to get to know each other, we had no troubles, because we inherently 'knew' each other.....

Thursday, November 22, 2007

When the goat took it over...

I always liked the goats , not on my dinner plate but on the cerebral plate cells that send out chemical signals to respond to some 'gross shape' that u personally like...and this gross shape always comes unprecedented,,,meaning it may be microscopic (i love the way MCF7 cells look in the microscope, with their diamond shape) or can be highly squishy and gellified with no actual support but just a mass of substance ..like the fruit jelly , or can be in a symmetrically defined also...so ultimately, - i ,,,er...like the goats...

So, 

when i was thinkin of a model biotic for running the utopic , the goat ( the capri) came into my mind..

so this is the time when goats populated the earth, and ...they were very good in information technology...

PS: and the binary system consisted of: For 0 - Me and for 1- mee...

So, ultimately it happened that certain goat populations that thrived in south east asia, went around the worlds for working in 'characteristically designed to be redundant', 'unexplainably pleonastic' profession involving 'Software' (Yes! we actually also mean soft goaty stuff like 'pashmina' from India, 'Baumwool' from germany also Tabachi, cork and merino wool..in addition to wat we actually meant..)...

One of these Created-to-be-globe-wanderers-since-they-know-binary, set on airplanes to their destinations...He was shocked when the flight didnot have a Air conditioning in the special animal cabin (which had seats specially designed to hold the characteristic of the pet animal he had...he had a brown haired, grey eyed, native white color-but-tanned-at-the-pet-store-for-glamor Human pet..)

Ps: the charactersitic of the human pet he had was its arse, which had adipose layers so that animal can actually do some fancy trick called as 'sitting'...

So going back to the story, actually there were signs everywhere once he landed in the foreign land:

If you spot or encounter an aggressive or potentially dangerous animal wandering around your neighborhood or general vicinity, contact the Critter County Animal Control office or, if after hours, the Capri Mutt's office. Phone numbers for the respective offices are listed below. 

ph: +me mee meee


the post ends here, as i have some human scientific job at the minute..,,,
-Dido

Tuesday, August 21, 2007

RICOCHETS....

On a high gravity mastication of thoughts, I have always seen how contradicting is the essence of philosophy, uttered while on the path to revelation by men purported to have high repute. Just like the law of nature widely believed is the "two faces" of any existing concept/person/thoughts/reality...the ying-yang, the good-bad, and so on...But the picture is yet incomplete without including the unique concept of having a neutral visage for any existing phenonmenon as mentioned in the language of the cosmos, the language of the most ever primitive yet, civilised human being- the Sanskrit.. This language includes a "neutrality" in its conjugation, a neutral gender and so on..This is not like a neutral unbiased existence by itself but rather, a melting point of two extremities. The melting points where boundaries fade, the melting point of two contrasts - like the fauna and flora...like the fungi that is both an beast and a plant!!!..the melting point of two worlds, like the green colour that form when you mix yellow and blue ; and how the green is not a single green but actually a gradient that can be sensibly altered to a variety of green shades.....

I think am deviating from the idea....But now established that ANY philosophy has 2 shades and also a melting point (which exists as a gradient)...And what really is happening is that each one of the human mind involved in religion, vedanta, philosophy, and such similar pursuits, derives a certain "shade" of thought...the shade could be "light" but could be suited for that person,,, but the light shade is yet unsuited for crores of other people as each of us are made of inherently different mind substance and each of us are in varying levels of the spiritual pursuit...So when such pre-conceived thoughts originating from a person totally different and unique from you, how can such thoughts lead you to enlightenment, rather wont it stymie your mind like a mis-fixed jigsaw puzzle piece??? thats exactly the point I like to marshall, each of can (if we desire) listen and read about such philosophies but, we must devise our OWN thought process that is inherently idiosyncratic....idiosyncratic like the design we find in the "keys"- the design scheme that is not repeated else where for safety (unless of course copied by the illegal keymaker!!!thats exaclty the point)... having said this you must not wonder why my concept should actually influence you... the concept can influence, but my thoughts SHOULDNOT...

Like how Einstien commented on asking about what was education according to him (He being an all-time-dumbo at school and an all-time-genius in life)...Einstein quacks, "Education trains the mind to think..." ; meaning education should make you "think" that is, generate new ideas, work on undiscovered and uninvented ideas, and education must not be somethin that jus gives you a gross mental study material that can be mugged up and puked when neccessary... An analogy to this is the topic we are interested in quacking about;;;; Has religion, scriptures, customs, culture, philosophy, and so on (which are nothing but SOME BODY'S ORIGINAL THOUGHTS) spurred the creative philosophical thoughts in the populace...the answer is largely NO, as the populace is still 'largely' doting on someone's words, quoting somebody's thoughts, thereby developing a certain 'mental stymie' exactly at that place in the brain where creativity springs up on the path to realisation of the supreme!!!!

--DiDo

And that was the squeaky episode::

There are these occasions when I cannot prevent myself from succumbing to the temptation of inventing oh-so-cute epithets for certain organisms...this childhood habit had wide coverages including creatures from goats to tortosies to human babies to even my sibling (my sibling is certified internally within the family's vicous- circle members -- for which I am the chief contributing member-- to have a certain "pet like creature qualities" by possessing the 2 distinguishing qualities of a pet besides others::: 1) being utterly unmanageble at all circumstances 2) needing all exclusive things from :: demanding the comfy zone at home to demanding first rights to every single existing item at home save others' toothbrush and lingerie...)

....I remember the time when I was a tiny kid of say pre-school when my father used to take me to the apartment meeting (well u now know from whr my "blog for the society" concerns spurted..ha ha)...And somehow this herd of goats had prior knowledge about this meeting held every saturday and used to stroll around and cross via., our apartment at a specific time slot after the meeting when the male specimens of the meeting (one of which was holding a oh-so-innocent pre-schooler--thats me) can be seen migrating towards the silent hush-hush space between the gate and the main road for enjoying the then 'long long ago':: unpolluted Chennai sea breeze. I used to make all efforts to be still in papa's arms but manage to bend and touch the goats...and that moment saw the earliest memory of the incident of me inventing various names for such biotic-mortals with epithets that didnt belong to any existing language on earth....

And so, eventually, for the next two decades, everytime on spotting the oh-so-cute features , my pectoral lobe would be put under some internal brownian movements and would eventually cook up and finally convey the signals of an absolutely non-existent epithet for the object of my appeal.

And so, when Squeaky was discovered by the inherently compassionate being living with me (he is a "compassion inside: Death rock outside" combo)..the cousin of mine; it created quite a lot of exciting stir in a nutshell...The stir was further bolstered by a series of composite features of the baby squirrel, like a soft fur, innocent almond eyes, the way he curled up in sleep, even the reality of ticks harboring his fur and how gullibly unaware he was of the existence of the bugs on him... the way he squeaked, the way he bit us with a nano-scale set of mallibles that was on the process of metamorphorsing to teeth, the way his cute conk always searched for a comfy zone that was less lit, that was warm and that which had less air flow...So such attributable amalgam of display by the "squeaky"; biologically a squirrel by species; saw the resurgance of an yet again creative flux in my mind to conjure up innumberable epithets; to which I am positive that squeaky was sub-consciously responding...

Well...one uneventful evening saw squeaky escape from his highly protected artificial home created by some jobless friends of his (thats exactly us!!!) to hopefully join to exist blissfully with some of his similar-species uncle/cousin...well squeaky we miss you but I still have the infinity scale names given to you fresh in my mind...needs another exclusive blog to pen it down!!!!

To Squeaky::: the squeakiest!!!

--DiDo

Thursday, August 16, 2007

One blog a day...

One blog a day, keeps boredom away!!
(Saying applies until the time project starts...)


Two blogs a day, keeps everyone away... Hmmpphh... people dont prefer loquacious specimen whose gender spells 'female'

--DiDo

Hmm...Well..."Strange" strangers as critics..


Yet another day...whereas the delimitations for aspirations in life is considered one of the self-deciding component of one's blithe living; there are scaffold where you tend to articulate your aspirations as writing to forums/blogs and such awfully engrossing leisure spots...(here by "aspirations" we gladly tend to embrace wide contrasts of things like::: your aspiration to become a surgoen or astronaut, or to jog everyday, or to eat the Rs 99/- unlimited pizza at Alwarpet and make the pizza place owner bankrupt to such an extent that he can't afford to buy even an ounce of 'maida', or the most gloriously potrayed aspirations ever, to "date" men/women or both(?)...and the list baloons further.....)
But what really happens is that on you penning down such stuff, you tend to invite snare, glares and so on from fellow populace...(here by "fellow" we mean people similarly recording such riveting(!) stuff through words).
So the undeniable event of encountering some one who in a hardly impeccable sentence formation patterns of the English language sent a morsel (morsel=scrap...actually we dont publicise networking sites here...so dont expect me to add the explanation for 'morsel' again), stating that the specimen actually liked the "attitude" displayed in the profile but came out with a yet another not-at-all-required advice that one should not get too ambitious...well..er..translating to basically to::: u can display any amount of feat (any people will evetually like it) but u mustnot actually pursue on that line to 'achieve' anything...(as people may not like dat)
PS: I couldnt find the gender of the specimen. But looking at the probablity of events such this, and based on the untold norms of male-female behaviour, i certainly would have liked to blog about HOW-the-male-gender-cant-endure-ambitous-female counterparts...(but one of the rule of our blogging standards strongly extempt me from writing in this angle..the rule states: avoid generalisations and the standard-formats which are terribly the speech fallacies and ga ga...)


--DiDo

Tuesday, August 14, 2007

Vanity Bites...


whoa....lemme tell you how the over-confidence of having enormous money and position got as a legacy rather than self-effort; give a certain epigenetically (!) disturbed mental disposition to certain people. An epitome for this is my personal witness of the person at the VISA interview who had all airs about her from the time her feet thumped into the embassy premises. On her turn for the interview, she was observed by us, (the mute students …one of which would eventually literate the community about this “unique behaviour” through the blogging process...he he!!) to have a certain pattern of highly disturbing rather irritating body language, a false accent, a made-up attitude…All this was further put to use by the person in describing a not-at-all-required detail of her being the great-grand daughter of a business magnet in the country. On questioning about the inadequacy of her documents needed to support her VISA application she merely went on to say about the wealth her great-great grandfather had left behind, which was ‘obvious’ according to her, saying ‘come on…I belong to the X.D.Z family…And we obviously have lots of money’. The most 'sorry' position was for the official who interviewed her and was dumbstruck with the ruthless audacity with which the lady spoke..So ultimately we students couldnot get over the temptation to gossip and stir the premises out of its meditative state…we ultimately concluded that she was stoned….rather stoned with the mysterious drug of vanity…actually overdose I must say…..
--DiDo..

The Expanding Lines of This Blog

On the unavoidable circumstances of the thoughts overpowering and jumping outta the idea of a originally being blog for abroad studies, I hereby declare this blog to be a scaffold for any-many thoughts, ideas and such similar cousins of philosophies…(specific note to Jithu a.k.a JJ , this..)But let the name of the blog be the same as Shakespeare beautifully blurts – What’s in a name??”

--DiDo..

MY Japanese name is:::


MY Japanese name is:::


“Hiroko Sasaki”


Source: 
http://www.blogthings.com/japanesenamegenerator/

Hence forth the blog can also be complicatedly named as - Hiroko Sasaki and Yoshiyuki Suzuki’s abroad geezer’s blog..

Friday, August 10, 2007

(Picture::: Giacomo Balla - 1923, modern art on "pessimism and optimism")


Some excerpts from a Survey of Doctoral Education and Career Preparation I came across in the world wide web;;; Like:::
"Be extremely careful selecting your advisor. Make sure they have the following qualities:
1. successful graduation of students from their lab
2. good funding
3. good publication record
4. good recommendations from former students
5. good people working for them
6. time to meet with you.."

"Be prepared for failure of experiments most of the time.
Also be prepared to stay in the graduate program for a really long time. 4 years is not the norm--more like 6 or 7"

"Make sure you know why you are there and what you want to do with your degree. Then make sure your advisor knows, too. Make a plan with your advisor that will both satisfy his/her requirements for your degree, and still get you out in a timely manner so you can go on to the next phase of your life."

the link is::: http://www.phd-survey.org/advice/molecular_biology.htm


dido says:: but beware the survey has inputs from jus-outta PhD or students pursuing PhD and has major fallacies and generalisations like:

"If you are a woman and want a family as well as a respectful career in science, forget it. Maybe you'll be a respected, successful scientist if you give up all other hopes and dreams, but this is not a guarantee. If you happen to become both, a mother and a scientist, one will suffer. Usually it's motherhood and the children. Most scientists are crappy parents. Our society does not encourage bright, talented women to breed. Particularly in science, women are punished for breeding. Neither sex is encouraged to be attentive parents, active members of their community, or maintain outside creative interests/hobbies. "


dido says:: A generalisation as in here is absolutely drastic and pushingly pessimistic....but it definitely holds true if u r basically not destined with good managerial skills (here we intend to actually refer to the siamese twins of livelihood - managing home and career)!!!


PS1: Hence this survey material isnot of diagnostic nature or to be taken as the touchstone for deciding abt ur choice for a PhD..Remember each of us have our way of living..


PS2: I remember the time when we were contemplating on career preference between PhD or not, after Masters; there was this similar kind of argument that was sent by a friend as an email forward...i still remember and recall how somebody's views sent as forward drastically changed the career decision of a collegue, who decided not to pursue doctorate studies...Well..er..such are life's dearies and the impact of some Mr.X's views sent as email attachment...Its better to look into YOUR heart and YOUR life...Again :;Remember each of us have our way of living..

--DiDo

Monday, August 6, 2007

Some exciting shopping tips for the geezers...


Though this site specifies shopping neccessities for students moving to USA, it is also applicable to students moving to other european and german countries....

Sunday, August 5, 2007

Why can’t I find Good Men?

When an Indian visits any Country West of Istanbul, he can’t help but invite Stares from the Native Whites. The Reason, They think we all brown skinned people are terrorists. Thanks to our fanatic so called terrorists but I would label them ‘Cowardists’. There is a certain degree of difference between a Terrorist and an Indian. “Terrorists Hate Americans, Indians Hate Themselves”, ha!

One sane reason to explain Suicide bombings is the fact that they are shit Scared of their lives and deem it better to die a so proclaimed glorious death than of Old Age. Well it sounds Nice but is Crap.The omnipresent Ghost of today, the Terrorist feels so proud in doing damage and is someone who marvels at humanity getting back to the Stone Age where He could again be Mr. Ape when we all have strived to do just the opposite. It’s also not fair to think of the Westerners as Sheep, Let’s not forget WW1 and WW2 were all started by the Whites, looks like there are no Sheep indeed but all Wolves trying lamely to look like sheep. Terror is omnipresent, During WW2 the Jews were terrified of the Germans and after WW2 the Germans were terrified of the Russians, and at the same time we Indians were terrified of each other and still are. We all are one Terrified and Violent Race. We are born with violence, we sure were always destructive as kids but as we grew our destructive tendencies went undercover. Nobody can deny being Non-Violent, Look at the pathetic outcome of India’s Independence – the Partition, The American bombings of Hiroshima, Let’s not deny anything.

Indians, It feels like we as a whole are the least violent, the population says it all, well one could argue the same about China but no (ha, Nobody messed with them as nobody could understand them) the infamous ‘art of war’ was authored in China long long ago. We are peace loving people but we love peace in a special way i.e. we are not bothered about peace.

When we visit a foreign country it embodies so much Unity, the clean Roads, the order, the glory of development and we are awe struck. We always could learn a thing or two from them but there is this ‘True Indian’ who refutes by stating that we have better Marital Relations and we don’t eat living beings, ha well till this moment I had never known that Plants were dead beings. Nobody can beat us at being hypocritical or Ignorant or both but we are peace loving. If it weren’t for our Peace-loving traits our Indian populations couldn’t have thrived in England, Canada, Saudi Arabia, and the USA etc. about 30 Million Indians live in other countries (Please wiki NRI for more Info) and Australia’s total population is just a meager 22 Million and they like to play smart by penalizing a suspected Indian Doctor of Being a ‘Terrorist’.

Albert Einstein’s Comment on the American Nuclear bombing of Hiroshima and Nagasaki:

"Let me say only this much to the moral issue involved: Suppose Germany had developed two bombs before we had any bombs. And suppose Germany had dropped one bomb, say, on Rochester and the other on buffalo and then having run out of bombs she would have lost the war. Can anyone doubt that we would then have defined the dropping of atomic bombs on cities as a war crime, and that we would have sentenced the Germans who were guilty of this crime to death at Nuremberg and hanged them? – Albert Einstein



Well said Albert!; When America Bombed Hiroshima and Nagasaki the Casualties were about 200,000 including the dead and injured, nobody asked any questions and nobody were allowed to. Compared to that the WTC bombings were nothing and America reiterates by deciding to kill more people. One really feels for Iraq and its people facing ravage at the hands of the Mighty.

Looking at all the above facts, everybody is a terrorist and everybody the victim and at least the Indian marred by some communal disharmony can proudly say he isn’t a complete Wolf yet. It’s actually a record of sorts when we acknowledge that India speaks 1600 Languages, has all the religions in the world and the infamous Castes and communities and still the magnitude of violence we intend is or was less. It’s time we appreciate ourselves for this achievement.

Let Peace Prevail. Let Indians prevail.

A Conversation overheard in a Bar in Heaven:God: dear fellow, I cannot find peace on Earth, It’s so Violent and dangerous…
Devil: Yep, Why do you think I am here with you??? - RJJ